Are You Feeling Overwhelmed in Your Life?
Do you ever feel that you have too much going on? Your brain hurts, you’re cramming stuff into schedules, everything that you’re expecting to get done each day? Anything that then encroaches on that schedule becomes an inconvenience and possibly stressful or irritating? Inevitably, there comes a point where you need to figure how to get off the hamster wheel before you hit breaking point. The challenge then becomes how to untangle all of that without feeling like you’re failing, letting people down, losing income etc.
I understand the challenge, I’ve been there myself and worked through it. For many years I lived a life of working and commuting, not seeing enough of my family or doing the things that I really wanted to do. I’ve now escaped that hamster wheel having followed my passion for coaching and my life really has genuinely transformed beyond all recognition. I now want to share with you how I’ve done it in my life and how you can get to the point where you feel you have accomplished success.
My initial advice would be to start off by using a room that represents calm and what you want, rather than a room that you associate with negative emotions. Use a pen and paper, when you commit pen to paper things happen that don’t happen when you’re just watching, listening and thinking about it. Let’s define exactly what you want your life to look like. Don’t care if it is outlandish because even if you achieve 10% that would still be a great start on your journey.
Step 1 – Define Success. What Does Success Look Like to You?
Dream Day: Think about your perfect day, week or month. When it’s been fantastic what did that look and feel like? Dream about it. What time did you wake up? How much time did you spend working? How much time with other people? When did you eat? When did you sleep?
Schedule: What did your schedule look like specifically? When did you wake up, eat, see people, work, exercise etc.?
Environment: What does your utopian environment look like? Dream here. What space do you have, do you have an office, where do you live, what does your house look like, what car do you have. What would make you feel peaceful & breathe a sigh of calm?
Must Remove: What do you need to get rid of because they create unhappiness? What people, places and things drain you of energy? What can be eliminated or limited? This can be hard, particularly, if it involves people or if it’s things you’ve worked hard to create but will help you to free up the time and energy needed.
Emotions: What do you want to feel like? What emotions will be predominant for you?
Purpose: What do you feel like you’re contributing? Value and purpose? What are you doing when you feel that?
Relationships: What relationship(s) will be stronger? What relationship(s) will make you proud?
Step 2 – Blueprint for Success
Vision boards and such like are all well and good but you need to create a blueprint plan of how this is going to happen.
Mental Fortress: You must decide that your current reality isn’t an option anymore and that you need to work towards your ideal life. Set up the boundaries needed to protect yourself from falling back into bad habits.
Environment: List specifically what you would have to change in order to meet the criteria of your definition of success.
Must remove, delegate or limit: What in your plan do you know you have to remove, delegate or limit? E.g. Laundry and cleaning the house might be a worthwhile investment even if money is tight. It helps them and will certainly help you to focus on the things that are most important to you.
Reverse Engineer: Something you need to get out of or get into. If you shift that focus it can make a huge difference. Usually this needs to be very gradual. What do you have to do to make this happen? List the steps and start plugging away one step at a time.
Timeline: It needs a timeline to keep you accountable.
Set Mini-Deadlines: Set fast approaching mini-deadlines – lots of them! E.g. in 4 weeks time I will be…., in 6 months time I will be……
Step 3 – Execution
You now need to take action – the how!
Delegate: Take action passing on the things that you don’t need to be doing…there will be a lot!
Circle of Influence: This is immediate. It has a greater impact on where you’re going and where you’re going to stay than anything else. The people you’re with are either making your excuses ok or are expecting more of you. Keep raising your standards and play to the level you’re surrounded by but be sure they are aligned to your ideal life.
Seasons: Define the seasons in which you’re going to get things accomplished as you can’t do everything at once. Give yourself permission to have one thing at a time as your primary focus, it’s ok to let other less important things wait or go.
Build Fortress: Around your focus, you can no longer fiddle about. Create rules around your focus and don’t get side-tracked by the first thing you see.
Single Subject: Single subject schedule, focusing on one thing at a time. You weren’t learning about English in a Maths class…our brain can’t handle multiple subjects at one time.
I’m not going to lie, in order to make these kind of changes it requires an element of bravery along with real commitment to work your plan. If you’re willing to go there then your life can change beyond all recognition. Break free of the hamster wheel and build the life that you truly want. I would love to hear from you – if you want to make changes but are finding it difficult or you may be making positive progress. Even better if you have successfully changed your life for the better I’d love to hear about what that has brought you. Please use the comments box below to tell me more.